Surely all modern parents watched the famous Soviet cartoon "Kid and Carlson". The story tells how a little boy befriends an older man with a propeller on his back. The child was lonely. Therefore, he invented a friend for himself, whom he fed and waited daily for a visit. This phenomenon is called Carlson's syndrome. What is this disease?
Worrying about an imaginary friend
Many parents suddenly notice that their child is having conversations with an imaginary friend. Therefore, they have a question: is this the norm or a deviation?
This is Carlson's syndrome known in psychiatry. If the child is not yet 5 years old, this phenomenon is considered to be a variant of the norm. Such fictional friendship is a sign of the development of fantasy. Most often, a person or a “revived” toy becomes a friend.
According to studies, Carlson's syndrome in children occurs in 65% of cases. At the same time, we are talking about kids with a high level of intelligence and developed creative abilities.
Wrong actions of parents
The reaction of parents to changes in the behavior of their daughter or son is varied. Some ask to stop making up stories, and over time they begin to scold. Others take the child to a psychologist or psychiatrist. Still others even begin to ridicule fantasies, which is fraught with a loss of trust and the appearance of behavioral complexes.
However, it is not the child that should be blamed, but the parents themselves or even close relatives. Often it is they who provoke such a psychological reaction. Therefore, it is necessary to analyze one's own actions and deeds, and only then look for problems in the child's behavior.
Common Causes
Psychologists identify several common causes of Carlson's syndrome that parents should pay attention to:
- Lack of experience in everyday life. During the period of active mental and physical development of the child, vivid impressions are required. For example, you can take him to the zoo and introduce him to the animals. Simple walks in the park, blowing soap bubbles, ordinary games with parents will also be useful. When a child is deprived of impressions, he begins to invent them on his own.
- Lack of communication with peers. We are talking about situations where the child does not go to kindergarten. A recent move to a new place of residence, where the baby has not yet had time to make new acquaintances, can also be a kind of stress.
- Feeling insecure on the part of parents. Constant resentment from relatives or punishment even forsmall transgressions can provoke an acute sense of insecurity. It becomes difficult for such a child to trust even close people.
Other causes of the syndrome
Among other, but less common causes of the syndrome, psychologists single out parental overprotection. Many children from an early age are not perceived as a person. They are not given the opportunity to show their talents to the fullest, to express an opinion. So they begin to withdraw into themselves and invent imaginary friends.
There is Carlson's syndrome in adults. Most often it is detected in the representatives of the stronger sex. Its main reason is the refusal to enter into serious official relations. Such men do not allow their woman to prove herself as a mistress, a keeper of the hearth. For the most part, they are opponents of children, marriage and any other encroachment on freedom and independence.
Warning symptoms
Having an imaginary friend in a child causes many parents to turn to a psychologist. It can be quite difficult to identify the problem of violation and find a way to help the baby. Moreover, Carlson's syndrome can transform over time into a more serious disorder. It is easy to calculate such changes by the following features:
- daily stories about a fictitious friend;
- the appearance of isolation and lack of sociability;
- loss of interest in the outside world;
- the inability to distinguish between reality and illusion.
In adults, the syndrome manifests itselfchildish carelessness and shifting responsibility for what is happening to loved ones.
Required examination
In most cases, imaginary friend stories disappear on their own by age 9. If after this time the child continues to talk about communication, you need to seek help from a specialist. A psychologist is engaged in the diagnosis of Carlson's syndrome. At the consultation, the doctor will help determine the causes of the ongoing changes and find the right solution to eliminate them.
Advice for parents
Regardless of the cause of the syndrome, parents should behave accordingly. An imaginary friend always helps the child and supports him, is a kind of reflection of his inner world. Therefore, getting to know him can be very useful. Psychologists even recommend playing along with the child. You can show that a new friend is also interesting to mom and dad, it is worth asking about his adventures and preferences.
However, you can't manipulate a son or daughter with a fictional character. For example, to say that he had a good meal or had already put away toys, but his real friend did not follow the instructions of his parents.
Treatment options
If, after a consultation, a psychologist confirmed Carlson's syndrome, his treatment comes down to a change in the attitude of the parents towards the child.
If attention deficit is the cause of the imaginary friend, mom and dad will need to rethink their daily schedule,try to devote more time to the baby and his leisure. It is important to learn to rejoice at his elementary achievements, always praise and punish less.
In case of lack of communication, it is enough to enroll a child in a sports section or in any other circle. In the society of peers, it will be easier for the baby to open up, and the problem will be solved by itself. After classes, it is necessary to ask the child how he spent his time, whom he met, what he learned.
With excessive strictness and overprotection, you should try to give more freedom of choice. You can assign a child responsible, for example, for walking the dog or washing dishes, cleaning his own room. This will definitely help him understand his importance in the family.
Quite often, the cause of Carlson's syndrome is hidden in guilt. Parents do not even realize how often this phenomenon occurs in children. So, the baby may blame himself for the divorce or frequent quarrels of his parents. He can complain to an imaginary friend and tell about what is happening, even shift the blame on him. In such a situation, psychologists advise to establish trusting relationships and explain to the child that it is not his fault in the divorce. Just mom and dad decided to live separately, but they still love their child.
If the baby is characterized by a feeling of insecurity, he can come up with a protector. As a rule, a well-known superhero acts in his role. In such a situation, adults should make every effort so that the child gains self-confidence and feels their support.
Monotonous life andlack of impressions can lead to the appearance of the syndrome. The child, inventing a friend for himself and, connecting his fantasy, tries to compensate for this in this way. In order to avoid such situations, it is recommended to spend more time with children in nature, attend exhibitions and sports competitions. A good solution would be to organize a birthday party for the child. Here it is better to connect the fantasy of adults.
Prevention Methods
The most effective prevention of Carlson's syndrome is the creation of a warm environment in the family, where harmony and mutual understanding reign between parents and children.
If a child has manifestations of violent fantasy, psychologists recommend redirecting it in the right direction. To do this, you can enroll in various circles or sections, for example, in drawing, modeling or modeling. For some, dance classes are suitable, for others, sports activities are enough.
It is important to pay attention to a child every day, even if the parents have a busy work schedule. To this end, you can resort to the help of various traditions. For example, make it a rule to tell each evening at dinner what interesting things happened during the day. It is important at the same time to let the child speak out, even if at first glance his story seems uninteresting. Some parents prefer to have these conversations before bed. Time spent with the baby will never be too much.
If a child dreams of an animal, it is probably worth thinking about acquiring one. It can be a cat, dog or hamster. A pet often acts as a substitute for a virtual friend. In addition, he will need to be looked after, walked and fed. This kind of responsibility has a positive effect on the child's self-esteem, makes him more independent and at the same time responsible.
